It Takes a Village: First Time Moms of NWHS

The expectation for women to balance a family and a full-time career is no easy task; however, Northwest High School has many faculty members navigating not only a demanding career but also adjusting to the lifestyle of being a new mother. 

In the last century, the social norm for women in the workforce has shifted dramatically. Since the Women’s Suffrage movement disbanded in 1920, society began pushing a new normal for women to balance both career paths and families. Over 100 years later, this reality is an everyday procedure for most women. Regardless, being a mother and having a full-time career is far from easy, and the United States specifically still has far to go in considering the rights and needs of new mothers and their children. 

At Northwest, a large portion of the female faculty tackle the responsibilities both positions require, but three moms particularly are exploring this new normal for the first time. Speech, theater and creative writing teacher Mrs. Payton, choir director Mrs. Murray and English teacher Mrs. Ehlers are all doing the most as both educators and first-time moms. 

Payton expressed, “In education, I [don’t] think it’s easy to have [a career and a family], but you see examples of women doing it and excelling at both. In the spaces I was in prior to this if you were going to have a child, you were basically giving up your career as an actress.”

Even before maternity leave, the preparation to be both an educator and a mother starts extremely early and has to be dealt with during the complications and challenges pregnancy poses. From planning when and how long a mother may be gone to who will cover her classroom, anticipating the leave can be a hard and extensive process for some.

Ehlers explained, “I didn’t have a sub lined up for maternity leave until two weeks before I was scheduled to deliver. I took two full weeks, eight hours a day planning for whoever that person was going to be.”

Similarly, Mrs. Murray voiced the hardship of not only dealing with pregnancy while teaching but also having to experience miscarriages and fertility challenges. While dealing with grief, Murray returned to work and continued serving her students regardless of the battles she was facing. 

“Society doesn’t prepare you for navigating a miscarriage and still coming back to work and dealing with fertility treatments while at show choir competitions and that kind of thing,” stated Murray. 

All three mothers also expressed how society does not quite understand the necessity and importance of maternity leave. In the Waukee School District, expecting mothers can plan around six to eight weeks of maternity leave, not including holiday breaks, depending on the type of birth they have. Regardless, this leave is not paid unless the mothers have accumulated a certain amount of sick and personal days while within the district. 

Payton voiced, “The United States does not cover maternity leave and does not have any sort of safety net, so the district is looking out for us. It is the bare minimum unless you have a complicated birth, and that time is not paid. I only got six weeks paid because I had sick and personal days banked up, and for the next two weeks, I didn’t get paid. Is it right that a six-week-old baby has to go into daycare because otherwise [the parents] can’t afford their mortgage? Who’s watching out for mothers and their children?”

Ehlers also commented, “It was probably six weeks before we felt settled, and then there’s only six weeks to go before you’re back at work. I wish it were five or six months, but I know why it’s not also.”

While on maternity leave, not only do mothers have to adjust to the countless challenges that come with a new baby, but they also have to navigate being away from the classroom during this time. Restless nights, undying concerns and complications that follow birth are all having to be battled while trying to separate from the classroom. All three of these incredibly strong women discussed that the students are the reason they teach and are the main thing they miss while being away. 

“Man, I was stressed the first few weeks, but there was so much I needed to be present for in my life that it was the right thing to do to fully walk away,” emoted Ehlers.

Although students and the classroom were missed, two things can be true at once. All three mothers expressed their feelings of worry or sadness about having to leave their young children at home while teaching or participating in many of the extracurricular activities they lead. 

Payton stated, “I felt daily that I should be with her. Even though daily I loved my interactions at school and I was happy to be back, the children had mothers and other supportive teachers, they didn’t need me. My role as her mother is the one role I have that can never be replaced.”

Murray similarly expressed this support from the people around her. At the end of the day, raising a child for the first time and returning to a job that is just as demanding and crucial for the future of society requires the help of a few extra hands. 

“We had a lot of resources in our village to make sure I was okay postpartum and that I was able to transition back to work,” explained Murray.

While being back at work, this support is crucial for mothers trying to balance a new normal, one that is nothing short of emotionally and physically demanding. 

Ehlers noted, “It’s challenging to find the time to be an individual, a person, and a mom, and a teacher, all at once.”

In a similar fashion to maternity leave, systems are also not yet in place to support breastfeeding mothers while they are back at work. Breastfeeding is an apparent part of new mothers taking care of their physical needs, and while teaching multiple blocks a day, finding time to do so can be extremely difficult. 

“For nine months, your body is changing, and it takes just as long afterward for your body to change again. I wanted to breastfeed my child, and to do that, you have to pump while you’re at work, so that was a challenge figuring out that schedule,” commented Payton.

Similarly, Ehlers mentioned, “My department is amazing, they’re super supportive, with breastfeeding and everything. You’ve got to be able to take care of your physical needs every two and a half hours, which is really hard on a bell schedule that’s 90 minutes. I have department members who are volunteering their plan period to cover that three times a day. It’s great, but I wish there were a better system in the world to take care of that.”

All in all, these three women are doing the most every single day in and outside of school. Teaching and raising children takes patience and care, and only a few can muster. These staff members are prime examples of individuals who can do it all. 

Payton concluded, “It’s a juxtaposition of this is the best thing I’ve ever done and the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”

Ehlers also stated, “Every day I look at him, I see potential, and I see what I’m doing for fifteen and sixteen-year-olds and how he could grow into that. I love seeing both sides of that, like where we are and where we could be every single day.”

These mothers frequently voiced the reward of being able to teach young people and raise families of their own. Considering the strength and fidelity motherhood requires, everyone must take a moment to consider the needs of women like these around them. Grace and support from individuals, organizations and even the government itself should constantly be received for new moms working hard every single day to show up for themselves, their children and the lives they lead outside of their families. Ultimately, it takes a village, and supporting those who are laying the foundation for our future generations is a necessary practice.